BILL AND I HAVE HAD MANY A STAY-AT-HOME VALENTINE DATE OVER THE YEARS. WITH KIDS IN OUR HOME FOR OVER 30 YEARS WE’VE PERFECTED THE BEDROOM DATE!
I’m so excited about this post about a stay-at-home valentine date, but before I get to the heart of today’s post I want to quickly remind you that today is Day 2 of the Valentine Blog Hop I am doing with an awesome group of blogging friends. Be sure to read to the bottom of this post to find the links to today’s wonderful bloggers and their Valentine posts.
If you missed yesterday’s Valentine Blog Hop posts be sure to link back to my post yesterday on a Couples Love Journal and you will find them all linked at the bottom of the post.
Why stay-at-home dates?
Bill and I have been married 33 years this month! And, we have had children in our home for 31 of those years and we are still raising our youngest six. Our last few kids are still fairly young so we expect to have them in our home a good many more years.
Through the years we have not always had the means or way to leave the kids to go on dinner dates (only person who wants 6 kids is grandma…but only because she loves them). And we wanted to have a weekly date, not just a couple times a year on Valentine’s or our anniversary.
We had to come up with a way to have time alone together weekly and keep our love alive without breaking the bank. We had to find a way to have alone time in the midst of a busy household. That is when we began stay-at-home dating.
From blanket dates to bedroom dates
In our early years of parenting we called these ‘blanket dates’. We would put the little kids to bed and throw out a blanket on the floor by the fireplace inside or outside in the orchard (weather dependent) and have a picnic/dinner/snack date right there!
As our kids grew into their teen years and stayed up later we could no longer do that because they were always around. That is when we began what we now call ‘bedroom’ dates. It was truly about survival!
Our bedroom was the only private place we could go to be alone together. So over the years we have made our bedroom a special place of refreshment and refuge for our marriage. Now, after 35 years together we still love to date! Especially, stay-at-home dates!
So, if money is tight or you can’t find a babysitter on this, most popular of holidays, don’t despair! You can plan a wonderful, romantic stay-at-home Valentine date.
Build Anticipation for your stay-at-home Valentine date
To build anticipate for your Stay-at-home Valentine Date:
- youPost reminder notes, make phone calls, and send texts in the days and hours leading up to date letting your spouse know how much you are looking forward to your date and your time alone together.
- Thoroughly clean and de-clutter your room so that there are no distractions.
- Plan ahead for an early dinner for the kids so they can either be in bed early or at least in their rooms reading. On these evenings even our older kids find a book to read in their rooms so the house is quiet and calm and we can use the kitchen alone.
Setting the scene for your stay-at-home Valentine date
- Set a fancy table – bring in a little table and chairs and get out the good dishes, silver and goblets. Use beautiful linens and add a pretty centerpiece that you love from somewhere else in your home.
- Light some candles on the table and around the room that won’t overpower you with fragrance and play some soft instrumental love songs.
- Make a cozy fire either in your fireplace (if you are blessed enough to have one) or purchase a portable fireplace heater like we did and pile on some cuddly blankets
- Decorate your room with signs and decor that fosters your love.
- Put out pictures of you as a couple if you haven’t already done so.
Planning the food for your stay-at-home Valentine date
- Making the meal together alone in the kitchen can be fun and foster care for each other. Keep it simple and remember…love begins in the kitchen! Laugh and enjoy the process. Be sure to have all the ingredients prepped ahead so it is a quick cook.
- Make a special dessert ahead of time and have it plated and ready in the bedroom.
- Chill some bubbly. Be it wine, champagne or even a gourmet sparkling cider, enjoy a toast to your love together.
Making your stay-at-home Valentine date special
- Keep a love journal – Each write a note to the other in it ahead of time. Then read to each other over dinner.
- Dig out old valentine cards or love letters you may have kept and re-read them to each other.
- Put on your best dress and suit and take the time to make it special just as if you were going out.
- Hold hands across the table during dinner and reminisce about past valentine’s dates, your wedding, romantic get-a-ways, etc
- Find a tiny space and do a little slow dancing.
Stay-at-home Valentine date video
How we have kept love alive and thriving through 35 years and 9 children
- Placing a priority on the other person – learning their favorite things, seeing to their needs before your own, helping with their projects and work, enjoying their hobbies, being interested in their work.
- By holding hands – all the time, walking, sitting, dinner dates, driving
- Always sitting side-by-side… at the table, in church…no kids between us, on the couch instead of chairs.
- Making couple time a priority – making time for dates, alone time in the evenings, time to begin the day together.
- By making our bedroom a haven and safe retreat from the world/kids. We keep it clean, bed made and organized so we can retreat there alone and feel rested.
- By putting God at the head of our marriage – Ecclesiastes 4:12 tells us ‘a threefold cord is not easily broken’ and we have found this to be true through the years.
- Making it a priority to pray alone together daily.
- Studying God’s Word together. That is our anchor in any marital storm.
- Occasionally we just dance in the dining room late at night
- Laughing and playing together – delight in time together, enjoy hobbies and home projects together.
- By making it a priority to study godly marriage books, workbooks and/or attend Biblical marriage retreats together.
- Continuing to dream together – planning, creating and building together…talking about someday so we always have a vision of life together in front of us.
Links to resources mentioned in this post
Couples Love Journal – Watch my post on how to make your own special love journal to chronicle your love through the months and years.
Weekend to Remember marriage conference – Invest in your marriage and click on this link to find a conference near you!
Shop this post
The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman This book helped us learn to love each other in the way that each feels loved.
Marriage God’s Way Marriage God’s Way Workbook by Scott LaPierre is an excellent resource by a friend of ours. Scott is a gifted teacher and we know your marriage will be blessed by reading this book.
A True Love Story Never Ends This sign is similar to mine.
Pin it for Later
Thanks for stopping by the farmhouse. Be sure to visit the blogs below for more great Valentine posts!
These are the great ladies sharing today on Day 2 of our Valentine Blog Hop…. check out what they have posted for Valentine’s Day!
- Dana at St. Martha’s Lens
- Anja at Our Gabled Home
- Callie at This Corbett Life
- Jersey at Farmhouse Basic Collection
- Wendy at Little House Simple Living
- Gabrielle at Life with the Correas
In case you missed yesterday’s Valentine Blog Hop posts here they are..
- My post on a Couples Love Journal
- Brianne at Home Made on our Homestead
- Amy at Essentially Handmade Shop
- Jenny at Yellow Rose Jenny
- Lindsy at Treasured Oak Springs
- Amanda at Cozy Tasty Home
- Rachel at Australian Working Mama
- Kelly at The Willow Mama
- Misty at Our Grace Filled Journey
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Also, be sure to leave a comment below on your strategies for planning a stay-at-home Valentine date. Thanks for stopping by the farmhouse!
Taking notes!
Wonderful! Hope it was encouraging!
Yes to all of this! We have a “date” every night. We got in the habit of always putting the kids to bed at least an hour before we go to bed, that way we can talk and download every night. Once or twice a week we make it more special with food or a period drama watching in our room. Time alone together is so vital to sanity in a large family! Thanks for this!
I think every couple needs this, but it is especially vital when we both have so many children in the home. So happy you are making marriage a priority! It is evident in your happy, well adjusted children and home that I see on your blog!
This is amazing I love to hear that romance never dies, because growing up as a millennial, people my age don’t respect marriage commitment and the value of growing your love through THICK and THIN. Amazing ideas and I can’t wait to put together a love journal and plan a at home Valentine’s date night!!
So glad you enjoyed this, Jordan! If you continue to work at your marriage and make it a high priority every day, then love does thrive through the years! Best to you!